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Gnomes and Goblins

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Nenicirene's picture

Of all the races on Azeroth, the one most like the gnomes is the goblins, which is particularly ironic, as they are not native to the place. Their arrival with the Orcish Horde a few generations ago was a substantial shock to us. It was probably even more of a shock to them.

While there is the occasional technical-minded individual in the ranks of other species, only the goblins share the near-universality of this inclination with us. We are both driven to analyze things, take them apart, put them back together, recreate them, and improve on them. They understand this need in a way that others do not, leading to a curious sort of relationship with them.

We are both best of friends and worst of enemies. We can talk to each other in ways that no other species can understand, and because of this we have to be careful in ways that no other species requires. Only a goblin could provide advice on our latest creation or steal the blueprints to it and make sense of them. In practice, this has worked out to a sort of professional rivalry. Even during the height of the first war, curiosity got the better of both sides, and we were carrying out secret diplomatic overtures unbeknownst to our respective human and orcish allies. After the ceasing of outright hostilities, during the detente period, there was substantial technical collaboration as we traded notes and theories back and forth, enlightening each other on our areas of expertise. When war started up again, we continued to have our conferences, though we refrained from showing our most secret blueprints. It is no coincidence that in the first two wars, both sides were essentially identical in technological capacity.

There are, however, substantial differences between our two people. As is well-known, the goblins have recently taken a mercenary bent, declaring their neutrality from political struggles and affirming their loyalty to gold. We gnomes, on the other hand, have stuck by our allies, even going so far as to not let them know of our internal troubles while they were at war, because we knew they would have helped us, diverting crucial resources they needed elsewhere. Also, when it comes to our technological bent, gnomes prefer to analyze, control, and create, while goblins prefer to disassemble, modify, and speed up. We are cerebral creators, while they are chaos given intelligence.

As I have surmised, perhaps we are the creative spark of the Makers, given separate form and set free to continue the act of Creation, a final act of Making their own replacements within the world they had already set up. If so, it follows that the goblins must be the Makers' destructive spark, for one must prune away old creation to allow room for new one to take root. That we were housed on separate worlds is only logical, to keep us separate until such time as our essences needed to be recombined. Perhaps someday a gnome and a goblin shall interbreed, and their child shall be a god.

In the mean time, there is one request I would like to have passed on to the Makers when they were doing their work: In all the other races, even the goblins, the females are totally stacked. Why did we gnomes get stuck with the A-cups? It's not fair…

Fascinating. I never saw the man behind the Wizard! You have taught this young gnomie so much about our race and class. Thank you, wise one.

Greetins, Nome. I stay wondering, you got any proof the Goblins come from the Red World? This something I not went able for confirm. There seem things what point both ways, an I suspec they native, but I got no proof. I chrai fo confirm this fo my monograph.