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Take your charity and shove it!

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Nenicirene's picture
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Calebros pleaded:

*images of poor, starving 60 Warlocks fill the patchment, as the shadows swirl around the images of dispair and poverty. Then, a voice is heard*

Every day, 1's of warlocks are left without money or healing, and this plight should not be left unremedied. For only 2 Crystal Waters a day, you too can have your very own Calebros to use as cannon fodder for Warsong, or an offtank-by-circumstance in any level 60 instance, or even as a glass cannon in Molten Core! He's cute, cuddly, and is available every weeknight (because he has no life) from 6 EST until about 12 for walks in the park, forced manual grinding, and 3100 point Shadowbolt crits. If you have even one ounce of darkness in your heart, you know that you cannot let another Warlock reroll a rogue. For the world is a much brighter, less whiny place without them. Log in the game, and send a letter ASAP, to show your support.

After all, Warlocks need guilds, too!

And Belith chimed in:

Just take a look at one of our incredible success stories:

"Belith here was a poor warlock with no home. Without 2 crystal waters a day, he too may have been one of the unfortunate souls to go reroll a rogue or mage. With support from a guild, Belith now has a chance to succeed in WoW life. Now he is giving back to his community, handing out healthstones at the local homeless shelter while working a 40 hour a week for the Azeroth Public Transportation Bureau, summoning travelers across the globe."

With your donation of a mere 2 crystal waters a day, you too could help with the success of yet another Warlock.

Though Dalej objected:

What's all this? Warlocks are the bomb baby, and in such high demand :)

And we have such great potential too!

And we have the Hellfire to prove it.

Water? We don't need no stinking water! We have Dark Pact and the new Demonic Sacrifice. Water is for poor, deluded fools, who took too much Destruction to get "real" warlock talents. Please, help these misguided folks away from the path of magery and put them back on the track to mastering the dark arts of curses and demon abuse. Only you can help fill up precious debuff slots and ruin the childhoods of helpless denizens of the nether realm. Do something unholy for a good cause today!